Close relationships are important for your mental health because when they work well, they provide you with a sanctuary to retreat from the harsh realities of the world. They’re a place where you’re able to remove your mask and be you. Ideally they’ll offer safety, security, love and acceptance so that you can rest and recharge and prepare yourself to face the world once more.
Unfortunately many people find themselves in relationships that do the exact opposite! They add to their burdens rather than reduce them. So if you don’t feel free to be the ‘real you’ in your close relationships, then it’s time to make change. If you’re tiptoeing around your partner out of fear OR if you’re controlling and dominating your partner in anyway, alarm bells should ring because this isn’t healthy! Only when connections are based on equality, truth and respect will they nurture you in ways you desire and deserve.
So how do you know whether...
WARNING: Some people may find this article very confronting!
When it comes to bullying, it’s very easy to point the finger of blame at other people and see the problem in them. But whenever you point your finger at other people, it’s also important to recognise that there are also 3 fingers pointing right back at you. And with bullying, the harder (but even more valuable thing to do) is to investigate how you as an individual might also be contributing to this issue.
Now this can be a very bitter pill for many people to swallow. You see, many people aren't aware that they interact with others in ways that perpetuate bullying and learning to recognise how you might unknowingly be contributing to the bullying situation is essential if things are going to improve on the bullying front.
At this point, it might be worth pausing and looking at ‘what is bullying’ so that we are all on the same page and speaking the same language.
Whether it be with your children, friends, spouse, wider family, neighbor or workmates, conflict is inevitable.
Being human means that you’re going to cause or get hurt in relationships and this can happen intentionally or unintentionally. But regardless of how it occurs, ‘hurt feelings matter’ and problems arise when these feelings get ‘swept under the carpet’ and ignored.
Conflict is normal and actually very healthy in relationships because it brings issues out into the open to be aired and hopefully resolved.
When relationship conflict arises, it can go one of 3 ways:
Unfortunately many people don’t have the necessary skills to work through issues. Growing up they’ve been taught to ‘keep the peace’ and ‘be...